How to Find the Right Networking Events for Your Business

The first time I went to a big national networking group, I walked out exhausted. Every conversation circled back to one question: are you going to refer me? If you've ever wondered how to find the right networking events for your business, and why some rooms leave you so drained, I've been there.

To be fair, that group works for plenty of people. It just wasn't my room. It ran on a point system, and the human part got lost.

That experience is why I started hosting my own networking event for mom founders, which you might know as the https://www.theconsistencycorner.com/mixer. I wanted a room that didn't feel gross. This post is about helping you find rooms worth your time and knowing what to do once you walk in.

Does networking still work as a marketing strategy?

Yes. Relationships and referrals drive business, especially for service based founders, and networking events are one of the most direct ways to start those relationships.

When I worked through my own Cornerstone Strategy this summer, I looked back at every client I've landed. Every single one came from a relationship or a referral. Every one.

So the better question is how to stop spending your limited time in rooms that were never right for you. Q4 is a great season to figure that out, since people are already thinking about connection (more on that in https://www.theconsistencycorner.com/blog/authentic-engagement-holiday-season: our episode on connecting online during the holiday season}).

And let's be honest about why networking feels hard. Getting there is half the task: getting out of your pajamas, finding your business cards, deciding where to park, blocking time for the drive. That's a pile of decisions before you've talked to anyone. Online events aren't automatically easier, either. Everyone rehearses their intro instead of listening, and the tabs you opened to follow up later get lost when your browser crashes. Not that this has ever happened to me.

How do you know if a networking event is right for you?

Look at who will be in the room and who is hosting it. A room full of potential clients, referral partners, or peers is worth your time, and the host's tone tells you what the event will feel like.

A buyer room and a peer room are both worth showing up for, but an event labeled "women entrepreneurs" could mean almost anything.

So do a little research. Ask the host who usually attends, get a few names of past attendees, and DM them to ask what they thought.

If you still can't tell who will be there, look at the host. Do you like how they talk about their community? Or does every piece of their marketing sound like a sales funnel? That's a red flag the event is a pitch in disguise, and we've all sat through a 60 minute webinar about hiring the host. The host sets the tone, and the tone is what you're signing up for.

Should you pay for networking events or stick to free ones?

Paying can make sense when you know the room puts you in front of the right people, because you're buying access. Free events still cost you time and energy, so weigh both against the return you could reasonably expect.

I want to push back on the instinct that free is always the smart choice. I'm not saying that in a bro marketer, get in the room with the seven figure people, join my $50,000 mastermind kind of way. We're all tired of that energy. I'm saying that if a paid event is full of the exact people who could become clients or referral partners, that access has value.

A free event still costs you the hours of getting ready, driving, and recovering. Either way, there's no guaranteed return, and networking often pays off with some lag time. But you can take calculated risks. Everybody wishes they'd bought Apple stock in 1995. Nobody knew the iPhone was coming, but the people who never bought in never saw the return.

Are recurring networking groups better than one-time events?

Often, yes, as long as you can show up consistently. Recurring groups build relationships faster because you see the same people again, and the next meeting does part of your follow up for you.

Be practical about your calendar. A weekly group you make twice is worse than a monthly group you attend every time.

The gift of a recurring room is that you're not trying to build a whole relationship out of a seven minute conversation. You'll see those people again next month, so the event itself becomes the follow up. If follow up is the part you struggle with, a recurring group might be doing you a favor you hadn't noticed.

One more thing: watch for clique energy. Think high school, think HOA, a group standing in a closed circle. If you're chatting with someone you already know, invite somebody new in. You know exactly how it feels to stand outside the circle.

How should you introduce yourself at a networking event?

Keep it under a minute, ideally under 30 seconds, and say it the way you would on the sidelines of your kid's baseball game. Your intro only needs to make someone curious enough to ask a follow up question.

Opening with your polished elevator statement is a pitch slap. Nobody wants that at Little League, and nobody wants it at a networking event.

Here's what I'd say instead: "Hey, I'm Ruthie. I'm originally from Indiana and now I live in Florida. I run a marketing agency, and we love helping mom entrepreneurs. Tell me a little more about what you do." That's a conversation between two humans.

Practice a few versions and time them. If they ask you a question, your intro worked.

What questions should you ask at a networking event?

Bring a few questions you can pull out when a conversation stalls, such as how long someone has been in business or what they're looking forward to right now. Then follow up with "tell me more about that."

A few I keep in my pocket: How long have you been in business? What's a problem your clients are trying to solve right now? What's something you're looking forward to? Is there a local business you think more people should know about? Have you read or listened to anything good lately? People love giving recommendations, and you learn a lot from what they choose to share.

Please don't talk about the weather. The weather, the news, and our kids are fine as a doorway, but they're a terrible place to hang out. Most networking conversations never leave the doorway, which is why you can talk to 11 people and remember none of them.

My favorite question of all is simple: "Tell me more about that." It hands the conversation back and gives the other person permission to go one level deeper. And if someone is a talker, let them talk. You'll still know them better than the person who spent the whole time waiting for their turn.

I also love a tip from the Feeling Things podcast on relating vs one upping. If someone mentions a Colorado trip, the one upper recaps their own. The relater says, "We loved Estes Park. What was your favorite part?" and hands the conversation back.

How do you start a conversation with a stranger?

Compliment something someone is wearing, and wear something that gives other people an easy opening to talk to you.

I look for someone with a cute bag, great shoes, or fun jewelry. "I love your jacket, where did you get it?" opens a conversation every single time.

I learned to use this in reverse the hard way. At a three day event, I planned polished, completely neutral outfits, and my biggest regret was not wearing something more interesting. Now I lean into sparkles, hot pink, or fancy shoes.

Online, the surface area is smaller, but the idea is the same. Earrings, lipstick, or your background can all start a conversation. People comment on my office wallpaper (it's my brand colors) all the time.

How many people should you try to meet at one event?

Two or three good connections is a strong result at most events. Decide ahead of time what type of person you hope to meet so you can be selective without feeling rude.

Before you walk in, decide who you're looking for: potential clients, referral partners, a collaborator, or a peer who gets it. That way you aren't exhausting yourself trying to meet all 50 people.

You don't need 50 business cards or 50 coffee chats. Being selective is what makes the follow up survivable.

Before you walk away from a great conversation, say your ask out loud, like "Let's grab a coffee chat." Even better, have a QR code to your calendar link. People are going home to full plates, so don't assume they'll look you up.

At virtual events, the chat is often where connection happens, so learn the host's rules. Many hosts send an attendee list afterward, and if they don't mention it, ask.

What should you avoid at a networking event?

Don't go in without an exit strategy, don't share your whole life story unprompted, and don't leave a great conversation without asking for a next step.

At one local event, a woman cornered me for 30 minutes wanting a free Facebook ads strategy. I had no exit line, so I didn't meet anyone else, and she was never going to hire me. Now I always have one ready, like "I need to refill my coffee, it was great chatting."

Beyond that, don't word vomit your whole story, don't show up with nothing to say, don't try to meet everyone, and don't be the one upper. And please, skip the safe neutral outfit.

Find a room that was built for you

I built the Marketing Mixer because I wanted a room I'd want to be in. It's a quarterly networking event for mom founders, with breakout rooms and guided prompts so you can talk with people in small groups. And I promise my questions are fun.

Our next Mixer is November 19, and I'd love to see you there. {: Save your spot at the Marketing Mixer}

If you host a networking event you love, email me at [email protected]. I'd love to feature it in {https://www.theconsistencycorner.com/mixer: the Consistency Corner Chronicle}. And come back next month for the follow up experiment I've been running since August.